God i kill You in me and in life about me 

i smoother Your presence with my lying ways

if i could cry, cry hard and long and deep

if i could see beyond my pleasure

beyond the insatiable curiosity binding me

in searches upon searches for some loose piece

unable to be found, some piece of myself

unknown but flashing in my desires to be found:

grant me tears hard falling, washable tears

to scrub the holes of my soul and world

tears construable to build new stories

strong to fashion another vision of worth

than the sought, the bought or caught

grant me what You know i need and can see

see through my muck-blockaded view

eyes that want You more than life

that wants You for life as Life

that You that is freedom and love

beyond all my imaginings to want 

*Thoughts of Richard Rodriguez

-The achievement of the Judaic tradition is that it identified God's presence as historically true, that God acts in time.  It also establishes what I argued is a strong masculin cult, which characterizes the desert religions of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam.  It has also made of those traditions an activistic cult, in that we are required to participate in religious life as actors in history - just as God does -rather than ejecting ourselves from history.  This is a powerful idea, and our present calamity has come about because the desert religions are at each other's throats.  We find ourselves faced with a religious experience which is only masculine, and nowhere more so than in Islamic fundamentalism, almost to a hideous degree.  The feminine impulse is largely missing from that history.

-While I continue to find abortion abhorrent, I no long trust male domination of the woman's body.  I also have my own crisis of faith.  As a gay Catholic, I find the sexual break down of the clerical order astonishing and not without interest, not only in that it has been so predominantly homosexual, but in that it is infantile, preoccupied with children almost as though it were an expression of a kind of unformed sexuality.

*Self-definition is the highest form of integrity.

  -Lethe Bashar

*...solitude leads one away from other people to bring you closer to them once you are able to face yourself in your entirety.

  -Carl Jung

*Generosity is the one thing that cannot admit of delay.

  -St. Gregory Nazianzen